Friday, August 12, 2011

Love and Hate are just the same side of a different coin...

Today is the day and while I'm getting my post up later than I wanted, here it is!

Hosted by Tessa of Tessa's Blurb the object of this blogfest is to post a selection of our writing demonstrating hate in some form. There are prizes for the winner and it's not too late to get involved. You've got the rest of the day! Go sign up!
Here's my entry from my current WIP.

Imagine if you will: a sky filled with brilliant, multicolored stars; a primeval forest thick with vegetation, a huddled mass of men, women and children bearing what belongings they can carry in sacks upon their backs. 

And me. 
I lift a burning torch high over my head, casting light and shadow all around. The people scramble for the shadows. They are afraid. So am I. 

There is the snap of a branch behind me. My body tenses: fight or flight? I turn to see the figure of a friend approaching. The light of my torch flickers on his face casting strange patterns. The face is a monster. It is an animal. It is a god. It is a man. It is Lenwe. 

"Narmer," he says with more solemnity that I have ever seen in him. "I have come to say goodbye."

His words surprise all response from me and for moments I stand dumbstruck.

"I am staying here, in Finias," he says and waits for the meaning to burn its self into my mind. "You must go without me."

"No, Lenwe, that can't be..." I struggle for words. I can't allow this to happen. I must find a way to argue, to convince him again. But I cannot summon reason to my aid. There is too much fear in the air tonight. "Lenwe, you swore to me, we would do this together."

Lenwe looks distressed. His eyes will not meet mine. "I cannot go with you, Narmer," he says weakly. "I cannot."

And then I see far behind him in the shadows of the trees another figure. I know it is she. She has made him stay. She has always hated me. I meet her glance under the stars and I spit on the ground. She says nothing, but I can see her mouth curve into a satisfied smile. 

"Lenwe, don't listen to her!" I beg, though I know it is futile. He has always been caught in her web. "You have to get out of here! You know what they will do to you if you stay!"

"I'm not a target," he protests. "Not yet anyway. But you are, Narmer. You must not abandon the plan because of me. Go and find a new land... away from all this darkness and terror. Go and I will be happy knowing you have escaped."

I must give in, for the sake of those who follow me. Months, years worth of arguments never assailed his devotion to her. She has loved him as much as she hates me and she has made him hers. My brother.

We embrace for the last time in our lives. "To the horizon," he whispers in my ear. And then he is gone, with her. I watch them walk away and wonder to myself if such love and such hate can truly come from the same heart. I will never know the answer.

And that's it! The (current) new beginning for my WIP that I've been struggling with so much for the past few weeks. Let me know what you think. Then go read the other entries and give them a cheer.

Also this month I'll be participating in Sylvia Ney's Wonderland Giveaway Blogfest. That means I've signed up to host a giveaway here at my blog and all the other entrants will be doing giveaways on their blogs as well. It's a giveaway blogfest on a grand scale. So stop by on the 16th to see what I'll be giving away and how you can get it! Or go sign up at Sylvia's blog to get in on the giveaway action yourself.

Later on, I'll be part of Christine Tyler's Spark Blogfest discussing how I decided to be a writer, what inspires me as a writer and what books changed my worldview forever. There are prizes involved, so don't hesitate to follow the link and sign up!


  1. Ugh. That is the worst kind of girl. Why does she hate Narmer so much? Maybe she doesn't even need a reason...

  2. Amalia, there are reasons, and to be fair they're not all her fault, but they probably won't actually be revealed until book 2.

  3. This was a good idea for a blogfest. Lots of tension in hate. :)

    That's a very believable scene. I tend to have a similar relationship with my brother-in-law some days, though not to that extreme. Well done.

  4. L.G.- Believable but extreme, yes, that sounds about right for fantasy! I must be getting there. :)

  5. What a fun blogfest. We all love to hate a character! ;-)

    I also wanted to remind you about the “Wonderland Giveaway” Blogfest you signed up to be a part. I look forward to your post!

  6. An interesting beginning scene. Good luck with the rest of the book.

  7. Oh, I'm intrigued. I want to read more. The tension is well done and I already hate that other woman. Just that little smile alone would do it for me!

  8. This is very interesting, Sarah! I would love to know why people are running, and why Lenwe is an animal, a god and a man. Also, even though Narmer hates the woman, it's interesting that there is the acknowledgement that her love for Lenwe is genuine.

  9. OK; I didn't see the other beginning(s) but I'd say you nailed it completely with this.

    There is conflict, world building, character building, plot introduction, a sense of impending doom. I'm all for an epic quest.

    There are so many possibilities for this story concept. I'm intrigued.

    And you worked in the love/hate aspect expertly. So many, many places to develop that tidbit of backstory.

    Very well done Sarah.


  10. Excellent tension in this piece, well done!

  11. Thanks, Christine! I hope to have it finished before the end of the year so everyone can read it. :)

    Jen, would you believe that those lines about being a monster, an animal, etc, didn't really mean anything when I wrote them but I've suddenly realized they are in fact strong foreshadowing? I just got a chill.

    Donna, wow. Thanks. It's nice to see that even though I wasn't focusing on any of those things, just letting it flow, it still came through.

    Thanks, Damyanti! I was hoping for tension.

  12. Great start to a story. I think it is perfectly possible for intense love and hate to co-exist. That is a mark of someone with passion and it can show itself many ways. Interesting that Narmer at least acknowledges the love in her as well as the hate.

  13. Thanks for sharing, but I have to say that I'm not really getting the emotion in this because I'm too confused at the setup. I didn't even realize that Narmer was female until somebody else commented on it. And I don't really understand what the plan is supposed to be, or what the relationship of the girl in the shadows is towards Narmer.

  14. Kelworth, Narmer is a man. And yes, I can see that this small section is confusing, however, it's not the end of the scene, just the end of the excerpt used for the blogfest. It becomes clearer, I hope, further on.

  15. Hi, Sarah,

    I enjoyed your excerpt. The tension is evident and the hatred between the two woman burns.

    I like the relationship you have between the brother and sister. It's real ... sad that because of a love interest the family breaks, but the journey must go on.

    Well done.

  16. Thanks, Michael. But apparently I need to make it clear that Narmer is a man. :)

  17. This is my favorite part: "I watch them walk away and wonder to myself if such love and such hate can truly come from the same heart."

    Wow. That's a pretty powerful line. Your opening did leave me wondering what would happen next.

    By the way, I found your blog through Alex's Worst Movies Ever Blogfest.

  18. I like your choice of excerpt - reference to the hate another character feels for yours. Great writing!

  19. Doralynn, I was worried that line was a little too contrived. I'm glad you liked it! Thanks for following me. :)

    Thanks, Trisha.

  20. I hate saying good-bye, but sometimes it might be for the best.

    Tossing It Out


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